Mother's Day is around the corner & I've got you covered
The sweetest little gift bundle for you and Mom both
The American cultural juggernaut known as Mother’s Day is around the corner, and I’d like to share a story about my very first Mother’s Day.
To understand the punch line, you need to know that my spouse is French. He grew up completely outside this American cultural event. He regards Mother’s Day with bemusement and as a parade of television commercials and radio ads.
My son was 7 months old on my first Mother’s Day: that beautiful baby age when we’d mostly figured out how to keep him alive, he could sit up and play for a few minutes by himself but couldn’t yet crawl off and get into trouble, and he looked absolutely scrumptious: beautiful plump baby cheeks and full of squish and love. I was pretty psyched as I woke up on Mother’s Day, let my spouse sleep in, and fed and played with our baby. I put the baby down for his morning nap and snuggled back into bed, full of anticipation.
All day, I waited for the big Mother’s Day surprise. Would it be flowers? A hard-to-secure brunch reservation in crowded San Francisco? A special necklace engraved with our baby’s name or date of birth?
Nothing happened, all day. Just a regular Sunday. Because this was before I really understood how to share disappointments in a way that invites connection, I went to bed super grumpy and full of passive-aggressive resentment.
The next part of this story is from my spouse’s point of view. He drove to work, a regular Monday for him, and arrived at the same time as his small company’s CEO. They rode up the elevator together. The CEO remembered that my spouse was a new father and said, “So, what did you do for your wife’s first Mother’s Day?”
Blank face.
“You did do something amazing, right?”
The full impact of just how culturally important an American Mother’s Day can be1 struck my hubby with full force.
💀💀💀
Back to my point of view: Mother’s Day is gaslighting. I also love it. It’s commercial, and I hate buying things for made-up reasons. I also love getting gifts. I am a ball of contradictions.
If you, like me, feel all those contradictions and also love to recognize your mother on Mother’s Day or love recognizing your own mothering abilities, and if your budget says yes! …. you are going to find my Lather kit to be precisely the thing that hits all those sweet spots.
Today is the last day to pre-order a Lather kit or yarn.
It will arrive to you in about a month, which is exactly the right amount of time to USE the kit to make a gift for the amazing mother in your life, who may or may not be your actual mother. (If this person is also a knitter, you might also want to gift them the entire kit!)
Here’s what you’re going to love:
The kit makes about four really special silk and linen washcloths. They’re shaped like leaves and are squishy, squishy brioche. They’re the kind of special washcloth that says I love you when you wash your face at night, or take a long, luxurious bath.
There are extra supports in the kit if you’re unfamiliar with brioche or need a refresher. Line-by-line written instructions to go with Hunter’s charted pattern, and an optional Zoom class if you need it.
There are 5 handmade body and hand-care items. Keep a few for yourself, and gift a few. Handmade soap by Tuft Woolens, avocado balm made by yours truly, a gorgeously scented sugar scrub.
When you buy this kit, you’re supporting two small businesses who are doing the values-first work. The pattern author: Hunter Hammersen, who is a 💎gem💎 in the knitting world, and me!
The washcloths knit up quickly in just a few hours. I spent a week of evening TV knitting familiarizing myself with brioche and knitting samples to photograph. I easily knit 6 of them.
Today is the last day to preorder the kit. (I’ll always restock regularly, but this is the official “close cart” day of the preorder period.)
If you’ve already ordered a kit: thank you! The handmade soaps that have been patiently curing arrived at my studio from Tuft Woolens this week (they smell so so good!) and I’ll be packing and shipping the first batch of kits starting on Monday.
For incisive commentary about how Americans love Mother’s Day but hate mothers (in other words, how public policies and cultural norms are designed to extract our labor in increasingly crappy ways), please read this piece: Mothers’ Day is gaslighting.
I can’t even remember my first Mother’s Day, but I do remember my worst Mother’s Day. We ended up doing what the ex wanted, believing of course, that I would enjoy sitting around on a tugboat with no sides with my active toddler while he fixed it. Needless to say, one of the many reasons he became an ex. It is infuriating how mothers are treated. Being a stay at home mother, with no pay, translated into low Social Security since it’s based on your work record. Yet, the job encompasses so many skills that are used to manage a household, cook, child rearing, finances, personal assistant, teaching, and the list goes on. We should be able to include it all on our resumes.
Anyway, I’m looking forwards to getting my yarn and making my mom and daughter some lux wash cloths just cuz.
Thanks for sharing the tale of your first Mother's Day! I am sure I had one of those days as well, not necessarily linked to Mother's Day - but oh, the feeling of disappointment can be so acute, and the crazy expectations that I realize are informed by all the noise around us. I'm sure it made you wonder how your spouse escaped all the advertising in the weeks leading up to Mother's Day! And while one might really secretly (?) wish for some acknowledgment, there's also the wrinkle of being totally gouged by all the vendors during that "holiday."
Also, I appreciate your sharing the gaslighting article - I have read a lot about pandemic impact on working parents and those are some real downsides, especially in workplaces where they didn't adapt to the new reality of parents having to manage their children's care and schooling at home on top of everything else.